When faced with infertility and a diagnosis of endometriosis, what steps can you take to build the family of your dreams? Kristi Corless shares her inspiring journey through various treatments, lifestyle changes, and the process of adoption. Join us as we discuss her story and offer support and insight for others going through similar challenges.
In this heartfelt conversation, Kristi opens up about her struggles with the powerful intuition she had about adoption before she was even married. She reveals the emotional challenges she faced and the faith that guided her through the adoption process, culminating in her becoming the mother of a beautiful little girl. From the touching letter she received from her daughter's birth mother, to the serendipitous connections that led her to her child, Kristi's story is a testament to the power of hope and persistence.
But Kristi's journey didn't stop there. Discover how she went on to adopt another baby girl, pursue IVF for her third child, and then conceive naturally a few months later, employing various natural remedies and self-care techniques to support her fertility. Learn about the importance of staying focused and intentional throughout the fertility journey. Don't miss this inspiring conversation with Kristi Corless, as she shares her unique path to motherhood and offers a guiding light to others facing the often-challenging world of infertility, IVF, and adoption.
When faced with infertility and a diagnosis of endometriosis, what steps can you take to build the family of your dreams? Kristi Corless shares her inspiring journey through various treatments, lifestyle changes, and the process of adoption. Join us as we discuss her story and offer support and insight for others going through similar challenges.
In this heartfelt conversation, Kristi opens up about her struggles with the powerful intuition she had about adoption before she was even married. She reveals the emotional challenges she faced and the faith that guided her through the adoption process, culminating in her becoming the mother of a beautiful little girl. From the touching letter she received from her daughter's birth mother, to the serendipitous connections that led her to her child, Kristi's story is a testament to the power of hope and persistence.
But Kristi's journey didn't stop there. Discover how she went on to adopt another baby girl, pursue IVF for her third child, and then conceive naturally a few months later, employing various natural remedies and self-care techniques to support her fertility. Learn about the importance of staying focused and intentional throughout the fertility journey. Don't miss this inspiring conversation with Kristi Corless, as she shares her unique path to motherhood and offers a guiding light to others facing the often-challenging world of infertility, IVF, and adoption.
Welcome to the Maybe Baby Diaries podcast. I'm your host, mariah Montgomery. Here we'll discuss all things in fertility, like heartbreak, joy, growth, loss and the wild, crazy journey that it is. Let's bring awareness, education and understanding to the table. You aren't alone. Together, we've got this, hey guys, and welcome to another episode of the Maybe Baby Diaries podcast. Today I have Christy Corliss on with me. Hello Christy, hello Mariah, thank you so much for inviting me. Happy to be here. Thank you, i'm so excited that you're here and that we're finally able to sit down and talk about all of the things Yes, the things. So I just want to start by hearing about how you and your husband met. Oh, my goodness.
Speaker 1:So I was at a meeting at my church saying goodbye to some people because we had a realignment change and so I wasn't going to be necessarily seeing them all the timer as much And I had no idea. But meanwhile he saw me and was asking around trying to get my number. So a few days later I get a call. Hi, you don't know me, but I saw you at this meeting. So that's how we met We. Actually, the first time I saw him is I was on a committee that we were planning fun activities. And one thing was a water skiing thing, and I hadn't been water skiing before, and so I met him, i told him about this activity and we connected and he helped me get on my skis after he was done in the water and from then on he was just so helpful. I thought, well, okay, i love it, i love it. So did you know that you wanted to marry him? Well, okay. So, to be honest, my first impression was and I remember telling my mom, wow, he's going to make somebody a good husband, you know, because I could just tell he was so cool and so nice. But he is 10 years older, and so he reminded me of one of my older brother-in-laws, and that's fine. But what did it for me is, the next time we got together, i saw him in a suit and I was like, hmm, maybe he's my husband, but really that crazy, crazy, kind of like out of the movies, that night it was. We were waiting for it to get dark, for fireworks, and we started speaking Spanish together. He could speak Spanish, i could speak Spanish, and so it was really like, as we were waiting for the fireworks, we had our own fireworks and I knew, oh my gosh, he was going to be mine. That was the only second time I was with him. I was like this is crazy. But we were engaged like that was in July, and that we were engaged by August 23rd and we got married that November 6th. I love it. It's just a whirlwind. Yeah, that's so sweet.
Speaker 1:So what did the beginning of your marriage look like? when it came to like family building, did you always want to be a mom? Were kids always on your priority list? Yes, for sure. So I have six sisters, first of all, and I'm the youngest of 10. And so all my sisters were having their babies, and I loved being an aunt, and I was only 19. I turned 20 soon after, a few months later, and so I was 20. So I knew that you know I could have time, but I it was. It was like, yeah, i'm not going to take birth control, i'm not going to prevent, and he's 10 years older, why not just try? And so we have.
Speaker 1:From the very beginning, there was no prevention. We were just like, okay, if this happens, that would be nice. So it took a little bit, though After about a year, year and a half, i'm like, hmm, and my mom did have endometriosis And so I was like, yeah, maybe we better look into this. So then we started looking into it. That's so hard, like when you feel like it's going to take a certain amount of time and then it takes a lot longer than that amount of time that you're thinking it's going to take. Yeah, and I did. I had this funny thought you know I'm big on intuition and and listening to those, those thoughts and those things And I did have an interesting experience before we got married.
Speaker 1:I wondered there's a special you know, for some that might relate to this. There's a special prayer in my religion we get to get that gives us some insights to our life, and in his special it gets written down And so you can look back at it. And when I was it's in it and it asks for me. Mine has it's called a patriarchal blessing And it has acted like a guide for me in my life with inspiration and things to pay attention for. And in his there was some wording in his that said those children that come into your home And of course we all know children come into our home, like you know but that when I read that, even before we were married, i wondered if we would adopt. I had a lady in my neighborhood growing up who adopted kids from different places, And the little ones. I remember when she went to like Mexico to pick up her little two or three year old, you know and I thought, oh well, maybe I could do that. I love kids, and so that's interesting just to think back. Looking back, i had that little impression even from the beginning that, hmm, the children that come, i wonder if we will adopt. I didn't know that. You know any anything more how it would work out, but that was interesting, yeah, yeah. What a blessing that was, though, to kind of have that little bit of foresight before, and so when it came time for okay, let me back up a little bit When you guys had been trying for a while, were you kind of at a point where you wanted to pursue adoption, or were you wanting to, like, try to bring a baby in through?
Speaker 1:Yeah, so, yeah, so both. So what happened first is we? after that time of a year, year and a half, i was like, okay, i better see, since my mom did have endometriosis, i better go ahead and see. And so we tried. I did find out I had endometriosis. We did the surgery And I did like I remember doing some Clomid And actually it was so bad, the endometriosis was so bad. He, right off, he said, okay, i want to put you on Lupron, it'll calm things down And we'll do this for Icarus months in case.
Speaker 1:I remember teaching a little lesson at church And I somebody made a comment and I knew that I was, i mean, still so young and such a brand new teacher And I knew that I should figure out a way to do something or say something to just kind of I don't know kind of help that I just felt like I didn't do the right thing. I sat down, i couldn't make it through the song And I was in the bathroom balling And I'm like this is not good, i cannot do this for like two or three more months. I cannot. I knew that this is like like this was just a little thing. It shouldn't have made me like in tears. So that was hard for me emotionally, like feeling like it's not worth it if I can't function. But it's, it's hard. It affects different people in different ways. You know those things that we have to go through with all the hormone stuff. And so I went back to my doctor at that point and was like I just, i just don't think I can do this for any longer. And so at that point we did, we did Clomid. Didn't work. Didn't work, we did artificial insemination And then it's, like you know, with all the things, that ended up like a year had passed And so then I had another surgery.
Speaker 1:He actually I loved my doctor, because how many times, i think, do they do this? He was so amazing. He told me the second time, when it was, you know, i was ready to have another surgery. He said you know what, i want to refer you to this doctor at the University of Utah, because their technology is a little bit, just a little bit better, where they can get it more thoroughly. Yes, and I was like thank you so much, you know, for that, because he could have just gone in and got the money and did it one more time. But I appreciated that, so went to, went to a doctor out at the U, we did another, you know, an in vitro slaparoscopy surgery.
Speaker 1:And then right after, as soon as we could, we did an artificial insemination. That didn't work. And so I knew for me, i was feeling like my goal was always let's do what we can, let's make sure that we can't. You know, if we can't get pregnant, then totally will adopt. Because for me, i didn't want to do in vitro at that point because I was like, gosh, 10 or $15,000 at a chance at a chance, or I could adopt and I could have this child, you know, and so, and of course, in my situation, i just felt really inspired that after that didn't work, that I felt like we had done at that point all that we could. And so that's when I started thinking about adoption. And, yeah, had had the confirmation, my husband was ready And he too he was. He was really like, yeah, yeah, let's just finish. You know, do this artificial insemination. If it doesn't work, then let's put in our papers, and so then then we did, we put in our papers, started our adoption process, which is another emotional roller coaster. So tell me about what that was like for you guys.
Speaker 1:So we, we went through at the time LDS family services. They were still going back then, which was a very big blessing because it was a lot less adoption Back then. Actually, it was only 10% of your income, not to exceed 10,000. So that was, oh my gosh, crazy to think of. This is like so my oldest is 20. So you think about 20, 21 years ago that's, and to us it still seemed like so much money and you know, and what, what he, his pay wasn't stuff. But it's funny to look back and be like, oh my gosh, we should have adopted five, so, but, but yeah, so we I had a good friend we started the adoption process.
Speaker 1:You know, the big part of that was, i mean, with all of our infertility journey, right, it's the control You have, like no control, like you can only do so much, but it's totally out of your hands. And so that was hard. But but at least I could, with the adoption, i could, you know, get my little collage and our little letter ready that the birth moms would look through And and I could do stuff to get you know a little bit on my part. So but once we had all the things done and we were approved, and then we were waiting, when I couldn't do like anything, that was hard Because I'm like, ah, it's literally out of my hands. So I, i prayed and I trusted and I the faith, and that you know. Of course, emotion is still there. It's it was.
Speaker 1:It was the hardest time in my life because I wanted, i wanted that baby And I knew, i, just I knew I was going to have a girl. Back to that intuition. I just knew it was going to be a girl. And, um, one of the hardest times I remember it was my twin 15 year old neighbors next door to me. They got pregnant one month apart. And so here, these beautiful 15 year old girls were getting pregnant and having you know, for them it was a little sooner than they might want and that was their challenge. But for me it was like, if they can, why can't I? So I remember, i think it was about that point.
Speaker 1:About that time, i remember praying again and being like, okay, just help me, help me be patient, help me understand, help me just get through this. And the thing that came to my mind at that point that has helped me a ton over and over, is the thought that, yes, i was ready and I felt it was time, but my child that needed to come to me needed to get here at the exact time for her and her experience and mission on this earth. Every time you say that, i get chills Yeah, yeah, and so it couldn't have been a month sooner. It couldn't have been a year sooner right For her. It had to be exactly when. And so at the time that just gave me that extra hope And I got these little tender mercies or blessings all along the way.
Speaker 1:I think we all, if we look and watch you know we can start to get these, and whether it's through through just personally, individually, with our, you know, relationship, if we have a relationship with God, angels, things like that, or if it's other individuals that come and tell us things and bless our life. And there was this other time when, about the time that we put in our papers for adoption, i got a priesthood blessing from a church leader. I was getting set apart for a calling to get just some extra help in this calling where I was serving in our church. And when they do this they give you a little blessing, and so the words stuck out to me. It was just the biggest comfort. He said in the not too distant future, looking eyes will look up and call you mom. So that was another huge one. So I had these little things that did it got me through, and I love how. I love how.
Speaker 1:For me it's always been about growing. I can look back and see how I, my faith, was able to grow. It was these lessons taught me for the rest of my life how spirit was going to work with me. Intuition was going to work with me. God was working with me, like how he cared about every detail. He didn't have to let me know or give me those little tender mercies, but he did. And I know not everybody will have those, you know. And so for those maybe out there that might be thinking, well, i don't have anything like that, i would just encourage you to know what just keep keep hoping, keep praying, keep having faith, keep watching. Maybe be a little bit, just open up your awareness and be like, okay, well, maybe I am having experiences, but I'm not aware, you know. And so I think I think, just just know that you can get that peace and that strength as you continue your journey, and there will be people and others out there to help, and and, yeah, i love that. So then you adopted Emily. Yes, so then we.
Speaker 1:One thing that kept kept happening is I kept feeling see where we were approved in August with her, and I kept feeling like, just in case it happens fast, let me get this ready. Or just in case it happens fast, let me have that ready. So I had all the stuff for the birth mom or birth you know stuff ready, Like I at the time I did Mary Kay. So I had all these pampering products and like all the things to to be fun for a little birth mom. But I had a few things that just needed to be engraved.
Speaker 1:If I there was one thing I got, it was like this picture picture thing, like it looked like a jewelry box or something from the outside And then if you open it up, there are these photo things where you could put like 10 or 15 pages in each of them, like a little binder type thing, but it was in a, in a yeah, in this. Like looked like a cute little thing. So because my thought was, if she's younger, if she doesn't want people to know, like this just can look like this, but you know, and then she could pull it out and like pictures of her, anyway, so I thought that would be cute and just some other random things. I just felt a little impressed here and there to get these certain particular things. But anyways, it got closer and I was just like, okay, oh.
Speaker 1:So I was in another meeting and I got I just thought it's all these things that makes me remember and just just have gratitude in my heart. So I just have to speak it out loud No, i love that. So I was at this church meeting. I was at a church meeting and I was sitting there and the speaker was talking about December, christmas time, and all of a sudden I felt kind of just this feeling, kind of all throughout my body, like in this thought like Christmas time, well, that would be a good time, because that's always so hard, Like, even though it's the savior and it's the birth of the savior I don't know if it's ever been hard for you, but it's like that baby, the baby There's a lot of the baby And then families at that time especially, it was my first, i had no babies And so all my family had babies and all getting together with the family, and so, anyways, christmas had always been a hard time And so I was like, oh, christmas time, that would be a great time.
Speaker 1:So, but it was coming closer than we got to December and it was kind of coming And I had kind of forgotten. I told a few people like my family and a few people like I think, because a friend of mine at the time who'd also adopted and was in my neighborhood, she said, okay, so just pay attention, because like you start to kind of know, or you start to kind of you know, something might happen and you'll be prepared, or you know, and anyways. So then that experience happened where I felt like December and so I was like, okay, so this is my kind of my knowing thing And anyways. But then December was coming and going and I'm like, oh no, this is just wishful thinking. I'm just crazy, like maybe I just, you know, i just don't. Like it's the infertility, yeah Right, right. So, even though I'm not on the drugs, like it's the hormones and the desire, you know, sometimes we just want it so bad. So I was starting to doubt myself and God and the prompting that I'd received.
Speaker 1:Then the 20th of December came and I was at the elementary school with my nieces, first grade class. We me and my sister-in-law and my mother-in-law at the time we would go over one day a week and we would listen to the kids read in first grade out, take them out in the hall, you know, one by one or in different places. But this particular day, since it was Christmas time, we got to read a story. So I was reading them, the Nutcracker and after I finished my sister-in-law came up to me and she said at the time I did not have a cell phone, i guess, or I didn't have it, i don't know, but she did. And so she said Tim called, you need to call him right now. And so I always thought I would be the one to get the call. So I'm a little bit sad about that, but no, just kidding, it's all good. The way it happened, it was perfect. But he said it was a Friday, so he's working home from Friday. So that's why he got the call. So it was a good thing, somebody was there, right? Oh, whips, next We're going on. No, oh, that would have been so sad. No, and I'm out in the hall in the Midland Elementary School Any local people that might have sent them Just in an elementary school in the hallway And he says Tom called.
Speaker 1:And he said ho, ho, ho, that was our case worker. And he's like oh my gosh. And the first thing out of my mouth was is it a girl? And he said yes, and I said, ok, like I didn't need to, like, like I just knew, i knew everything was ready at home. I'm like, ok, when are we going to meet her? OK, later that day. So I went home and I found out at this point I found out she was going to be half African American and half Caucasian. I'm like, oh my gosh, she's going to be beautiful, she's going to have this skin, you know, she's so adorable, so beautiful. But yeah, so then we got to just go go home. I was, she was due. We found out she was actually going to be induced that day. But she was due like the oh goodness. Now I forget, But anyway, she was due right along there. I think that was just going to be a few days early. So she was going to be induced.
Speaker 1:But what had happened on her end, which I think it's another, my story, i think, is full of just so many promptings and listening to that guidance And because she, her whole pregnancy, this beautiful birth mom, she knew this was a great choice for others And there's her situation if they didn't have, you know, a partner to support them And if you know they were young and like for her. But at that time in her life. She, when the birth father wasn't going to be part and he was like, see, i'm out. You know, she felt like she, it would just be too hard for her to do that. And she was going through this agency as well, getting counseling and stuff, and she just thought like I know this could be a good, good answer, adoption could be good for others, but I just I don't, i couldn't do it, it would be too hard. So that was her, her thought all the way through, and I do not blame her one bit. So all the way through she was just like, nope, i'm just going to keep, i'm going to keep, i'm going to keep.
Speaker 1:And at the end one of her counselors, like that last, that last you know few weeks of you know her, you know, like in December. So she started talking to her and she said, well, if you know, how about this? Do you pray that if you're making a mistake, the Lord will stop you? And she's like, huh, i guess, i guess I could do that. And so that was on her heart.
Speaker 1:And that night she went and to see her Bishop, her religious leader, and he had never once, throughout the whole time, said anything to her about adoption. But he looked at her that night. She hadn't said a word. And he said to her I'm so sorry, but I feel I need to counsel you in the way of adoption. She'd already had baby showers, she was all prepared, she had all the stuff, all the things she had, everything. So I just cannot imagine how hard it was for her to, in that moment she felt it alter her body And she's like this isn't my baby. Oh my gosh, you're right. And so she wrote a letter. I didn't get this letter until later on which, when we got it after the fact, it was so powerful.
Speaker 1:But she went home and she wrote her impressions down in like a letter to her family, because there was it was a divided family. Some were saying, no, you've got to keep this, keep this baby. And others were saying, no, you should place. And so she had a divided family. So she knew some would it'd be really hard for them as well. And so she the way she put it in this letter, that was beautiful, she said. I just feel like, when I think about it, when we were up in heaven, in our little groups called families, she wasn't in mine. It's up to me to find her family.
Speaker 1:And so she went, being you know nine months pregnant, here at her very end, and she started looking through all the pictures, the files and everything. And the next crazy cool thing that she was so brave to continue is she actually she had selected, she had selected a couple. They had this cute little two or three year old girl and she had selected them. She had announced to them and they were so excited They got to meet her and they were so thrilled. But they went home and as they prayed about it, they didn't feel good about it And they were sick to their stomachs. Because it's like you don't usually on our side, it's like we don't think about having to say no, like we're wanting that so hard. But they'd gone through the experience. The interesting thing with this, too, is they had gone through experience one time and they knew what it felt like to get their girl, because they had adopted that girl too right. So they knew it wasn't the same. They weren't getting that peace, they weren't feeling it. So they felt sick. But they fasted, they went into, he went into work the next day and ended up that he called home. They were actually fasting and he called home to his wife And because it was like you know, she was gonna be induced and have this baby and they like needed to know, yeah, and so he calls home to his wife like midday or towards the end of the day, do you feel any different? She says no, i feel sick to my stomach. We need to call Tom. And that was their case worker as well.
Speaker 1:We found out later. We happened to be at the same agency. It could, they could be. You know, they have files all over, i mean Utah and other places that's where I am at the time, so it could have been anywhere, but they happened to be in our agency. And the only three reason we found out So okay, so let me back up. So then the birth bomb. The birth bomb gets word and she's like at that point she could have been like, okay, well, maybe that I'm just keeping you know that, but she has to go back to the drawing board, she has to go back and look at our files. So she, she decides to take, i think, her mom and her dad. She took with her this time and she went through and they had a little point system. They weren't going to say anything to her, but they did their own little point system and she was looking through And I guess the first time, i think it was the fact that we had a little dog that she wasn't thrilled with.
Speaker 1:And the funny thing is is I never was a dog person, i was not going to have one. But with you know, when you start to want to love something and I had a friend, i had a friend who they had this little Maltese and it was just like this, this stuffed animal that was alive, it was just something that was so cute, something to love on, yeah, something that was so cute and lovable. So I ended up with this cute little Maltese one one time for my birthday, and and so, interestingly enough interestingly enough, i think that was funny, that she wasn't a fan and anyways but as she went back, you know, and went through, she really felt like it needed to be us and her parents decided, you know, to let her know. Okay, well, we weren't going to say anything, but that's our point system, that's who we think too, you know, and so that's why we got the call, like the 20th, and they were like, okay, let's meet in a few hours. And we had to be right there right then because we had to make sure and meet her and her parents. And then she actually had our daughter Emily. On the 23rd she was born and we got to pick her up on Christmas day.
Speaker 1:So Christmas time, i mean, it's like yep, yep, that's awesome. The funny thing too is and I think this applies to other things, not just fertility, but I just feel like I have to say this for somebody out there listening, because because it's really important, you'll get a lot of advice in your life and it's really important, i believe, to go inward and stay centered in what you believe, in what you know, and not listen to others' opinions. I found out later. I had this sister call my mom. My mom was out of state serving a church mission for our religion and she was, you know, so we could contact her by phone and stuff wasn't right there. But so I found out later my mom had got a call for my sister saying mom, what's gonna happen when Christmas comes and goes, or December comes and goes and she doesn't have this baby?
Speaker 1:I'm so worried about Christie, and so that's the interesting thing is that it's like ha ha, you know, i was right, you know, and actually what happened. Is that, sister, the reason we found out about this little connection and the extra faith? because we wouldn't have probably been told at least part of it or exactly what happened, i don't know. But I mean, we were told by our caseworker but we didn't need to know the exact person or couple, and at first I did feel a little bit like, oh, was I second choice? It's just kind of a silly thing. You know what I mean. It's so silly.
Speaker 1:But, interestingly enough, the way we found out the situation to shine a little bit more light on that is my sister's husband worked with this potential that was gonna be adoptive father. They worked together And so he knew the situation and he knew that he had to call and tell that caseworker we can't accept this baby. And then they know that we get a call and we're getting this baby. And so my sister said did somebody else? cause I wasn't gonna tell my family we're second choice. Just a silly thing, but it's okay, i feel like that's understandable. So it was just funny how my sister asked me so did they choose somebody else first or did they? and I was like yeah, and so I had to start talking to her and she explained the situation. So then I knew who it was And so about, let's see a few months or so later can't remember how long it was, she was still just really little So we knew these people, cause we served on like this committee with them or something, and so we knew them at this agency And so we saw them at a get together.
Speaker 1:What happened is she ended up and she had taken a pregnancy test and everything, just in case, by some fluke thing and everything before they decided, you know, to tell her no to, and they had those feelings. Anyway, she ended up finding out, like the next week or two or month or something, like she got pregnant And so she ended up conceiving and that's how they got their second one. Oh, my goodness. So anyway. So it was just cool to see that. You know, things definitely do happen for a reason, and I feel like the children come into our homes when the time is right and when all things are aligned, and I'm a total believer that things always happen how and when they're supposed to, especially with our families, because it's such a big, big important thing. So, yeah, anyways, that was the long part of that part of the story. No, i love it, i love it. So you got your daughter, yeah.
Speaker 1:And then where did you guys go with your journey? So then you know, about about a year and a half, two years later we are like, okay, let's put in for adoption again. And I did that round. I did have the first time around. I just felt like foster care would be too hard because I knew a little bit about that And I can't remember that time I didn't have my friend doing foster care yet. But anyways, in the beginning I thought, well, that could be an option, but I would be too attached, that'd be so hard on me emotionally to give them back when they are trying to reunification as their main goal. So the second time around I started to feel like, okay, well, i have one baby already And it was started feeling like foster care could be an option too. So we put in.
Speaker 1:We were waiting with this agency again, but at that time it was a lot, you know, and maybe with other agencies too, i don't know. But it was easier to get the first child, but it's kind of the second one sometimes could be a little bit more challenging. So we were waiting for a while and we put started to do the foster work classes and started to get in the paperwork And it was either our first or second class. That night I got home and we got the email. We had been chosen for our daughter, our daughter Keisha, and I had a little interesting thing with that one because I was starting to feel like, even though I wanted another girl to be next and to be, you know, that relationship and have fun, sister, i kind of felt like a boy was gonna be next. And so then when I was like, okay, well, girl, yeah, that'll be good either way, i'm good, just either way.
Speaker 1:And then the little foster thing. That was interesting because we did end up getting that was harder that time because there were six months that we knew. So I will say I would, every day of the week, take, take two or three days versus six months, because that was hard, because, again, you know. But then it's like what if she changes her mind? and what if this? And at the end of the day she, yeah, we got to go to a hospital to pick her up, a local hospital. She again was just an hour, like an hour away.
Speaker 1:The other one was like five, 10 minutes away at the agency as far as that placement went, but this one, we went to the hospital and I didn't. I was not excited about my thoughts on the hospital, i just felt like that should be their time And I didn't want to feel like I was coming in and fading or like I don't know. I just have always I don't know. So that was even hard going into that, knowing that we were going into the hospital And I didn't know anything about my really abilities back then to pick up others, energies and sensitivity and like all the stuff that I do now. And now I understand totally, i get it, but anyway. So that was hard going into the agency, depending on how much time you want.
Speaker 1:There was a little thing that happened. Let's just say we were late and that is the last thing you ever want to do at a placement And instead of we had a problem with a car seat And instead of just letting, like, the case worker go ahead and bring one from the agency I just had, i don't know, i didn't know how it worked And I just felt like well, we had to stop and get the car seat because it was missing this little buckle for anyways. So it was just my mind was not thinking right And so, anyways, we were late and I am late to things, but there's never anyway in my mind I would be late to something like this, because I just know how hard it is for the birth of moms, like I don't know how, but I've heard like and I could just imagine like they're waiting and they're prepared to do this, and then you're late like that And you know everything to like be perfect for your end, yeah, yeah, anyway. So, needless to say, when we got there, we the case worker was that her case worker was like livid and like reamed me out and I'm just sitting there like balling and I'm like so sorry, this is the last thing I would ever wanna do is hurt Somebody else. You don't know me, i'm so loving This is like the last thing I wanted to do. So, going into it my own emotions and her emotions, like everybody's emotions she wanted to be really brave.
Speaker 1:She was young. This birth mom was younger And so hers was. Hers was kind of intense too, because she wasn't quite graduated And she we found out later she was in foster care herself. So that's where my little part about foster care. So that was interesting, she was in foster care herself. She wanted to just show that she could do this on her own. She was living with, even though her parents were there. She was living with another family And so she wanted everybody out of the room. She wanted to just be able to place her in our arms and walk away and say she did it on her own And she did. But look the difference. I just have to say the difference in feeling like, oh my gosh, this beautiful Christmas present, and it was hard.
Speaker 1:On that second one, to be completely honest, i loved her and I was so excited that it was. It was hard, completely honest That one. It was like it was heavy and hard that day. But after the hospital, after heading home and stopping by an aunt's house that was closed and letting her see, and then letting all the family see and stuff, it got better. But that took a lot to forgive myself for what I did. And that started. I wasn't expecting all this emotion, but woo, so anyways. So it's all good, so we have.
Speaker 1:So she's 17, turning 17 this week. So that's interesting. That's coming up Her placement. It was the 6th of March. She was born the 4th and we got to pick her up on the 6th And it's actually the same day as her the placement day, the 6th, i think, was her birth mom's birthday, if I remember right. So that was kind of crazy. That was kind of crazy there. But her, yeah, anyways, yep, that was our second one, oh, so kind of crazy, yeah, kind of emotional, but I felt like I don't know, for whatever reason. I wanted to share that because things aren't even always perfect, even when you like, if you have a labor delivery and things can happen and you have the even amidst the, or a C-section, when you don't plan on a C-section or adoption, if you know. So, anyways, but just in the end it taught us a lot of things and, yeah, that her birth mom's very, very strong and beautiful, amazing person.
Speaker 1:And I just a shout out to all the birth moms, if any birth moms are listening. I know it is like the hardest thing ever And I just I don't even know if I could do it as a person, but I just want to just tell if you have not heard from your adoptive, you know the adoptive parent of your child. I just want you to know that they, even if they don't show it or tell you if you don't know them. There is this deep gratitude, like there's nothing, nothing we can say enough or do enough. That could I mean, just the gratitude Like there's like when there's no other way. It's like anyways, so you are loved and you are appreciated, and so by so many. So just know, birth parents out there. Thank you, i love that, christy, i love that. So you did adoption twice, yes, which was amazing, and then jumping all the way back to the very beginning of your journey for what you're trying to do, yeah, so with the third one, i was funny enough.
Speaker 1:It happens in these meetings sometimes. I was in a meeting and the speaker was talking about the story of Hannah and she was trying to have a son because, to like, carry on her name, her husband's name, for some reason, whatever you know, it was important to her to have this son and she prayed and she told the Lord she'd be like Hannah and she'd dedicate his life to him and just all these things. And normally you know, listen to those I'd be like, oh, you know, it's cool because she did end up getting her son. And normally I'd be like, okay, adoption is our answer. That's, you know, yours, cause we've been there, done that, tried that. But as I was listening that day, i was like, oh, i think we need to try, i think we need to get this one here on our own. I think this is ours And I'm like, okay, and it was nice to have a little bit of a okay, this is the next step, cause I was trying to decide do we do foster care? I think we were probably gonna do foster care, maybe because that agency it was pretty much two was the. You don't usually get more after two with that agency, so I was pretty much done Plus, since we didn't have a good experience with the your second. Yeah, i mean to be honest, that case worker did send us a little gift card later to a restaurant or something and be like I apologize And you know, but so anyways, but but that was you know, it was just really it was. It was. It was just the time I started feeling like you know, this one needs to come through us, and so I was like, okay, well, send me more information because, like, this helped me know.
Speaker 1:And that very week I was at this event with these speakers, with my sisters, and one of my sisters said to me hey, there's this lady who teaches these help classes and she even covers endometriosis. And so I, she told me when the classes were, and you know I'm like, i'm on it, she's gonna, you know, talk about, you know, infertility and the metriosis and women's hormones. I am on it, i need all the help I can get Right. So like when, what is it, you know? and so I went and, interestingly enough, i kind of tell this backstory because the in vitro wouldn't have happened, i believe, unless this step happened.
Speaker 1:And so at that time the piece that I learned from her was really really crucial to have any children, because I was using a lot of products that had chemical estrogens or the Xeno estrogens in it right, and with endometriosis it is a very estrogen dominant issue or disease. And so little did I know that every time I was using those products that it was as if picture it, as if you have a megaphone and you're screaming into the megaphone and then that is how loud those receptors are of all these chemical estrogens And our body it really just needs a whisper right Of the hormone. And so it was. It was really just overloading and it would latch on because the Xeno estrogens your body doesn't, doesn't, isn't able to discern whether it's a chemical or a natural, and it just latches onto that receptor site And that's yeah, anyways, we could go, anyways, hold on a thing. But so, basically that information she said turn around all your products, look for these ingredients, look for phenol, phenoxyethanol, look for parabens, methylparabens, propylparabens, butylparabens, you know, and all these other things, but those were the main ones. And I recently found out silicone dioxide, by the way. I do start looking for that ingredient in things, but there's just so many things. So I went ahead and at the time, another hard part of our journey is at the time I was a very happy sales director with this company, driving a free car and loving these women and helping them reach their goals, And I had this community, this tribe, that we just loved each other and it was so fun.
Speaker 1:And so, with this, all of a sudden, as I remember the day, i like turn around those products and I'm looking at this and I'm like my heart sunk and I'm like you stood, wait, i have a problem. You know, like huh, i can't any longer go and say put this on, take this off. Now maybe you can have infertility issues, but it wasn't even that, because in this class this lady mentioned and I went and researched it, of course, to make sure, right, but she mentioned it would proliferate or cause cancer cells to grow. And I stopped and I thought, oh my gosh, the founder of this company died of breast cancer. And I'm like, oh my gosh, this is crazy, yeah. And so I'm like I can't any longer say, put this on, take this off, and you'll feel so young and pretty and go get your. You know, i just couldn't And so I resigned.
Speaker 1:I faxed in all my information at the time that I got you know, because at the time I called them and they're I think it was even their what do they call it Their chemist or their whoever in their lab somebody in that department at least was able to talk with me. And I asked them have you ever had anybody you know ask for a paraben free line because of, you know, due to the zoonobestogens and the impotility and the cancer and things like that? And they're like, oh no, it doesn't, it doesn't pass through the first layer of the skin. And I'm like, oh my gosh, this was 20 years ago. No, but by this time it was like 14, 15 years ago. 15 years ago, 14, anyways, 14, 15 years ago they were saying no. And I asked about grapefruit seed extract where you guys studying grapefruit seed extract, because I had heard that that well, that doesn't have a long enough shelf life, anyways. So I I um back some of my information at least. I like to think that maybe with some of us that did that that kind of helped, because they later did come out with a paraben free line, but they still have lots of stuff that they don't have And the sad thing is the anti-aging ones.
Speaker 1:People are still constantly putting it onto their skin, not knowing. But anyways, so that started my journey and taking all of that out of my system. And so there for a while I thought, well, maybe if we could clear all that out and you know, listen to all this other information, just eat healthier, basically not processed. I just really, you know that just opened my eyes to wow, and this is what we know about. What other chemicals do we not know about? So I just started to really go natural, really with my foods and my products. I would put on and everything, and So it was a few years and I was like, okay, so I think we've you know, i'm not getting any younger and so we better ask about in vitro.
Speaker 1:And so I'd actually I think I'd also done maybe an artificial before Michael. We might have done an artificial in some way, and between Keisha and Michael, yeah, so I think at that point, when I was getting close, so I did do an artificial a time or two, i think, just to make sure. After you know, i can't remember 100%, but I think I did Anyway. So I was talking to my doctor and he said you know what, there's a really great place in Idaho anyway. So he connected me and we had to do this stuff for in vitro.
Speaker 1:We actually had a crazy thing We had to go all the way. I'm in Roy and in American Fork, so it's like a 45 actually, maybe closer back then to an hour, an hour and 15 minute drive. I would have to go out to American Fork to get things checked, and then I actually had to drive for the actual what do they call it? There's your egg retrieval, so the egg Transfer. Yeah, so the egg retrieval. I believe it was even done at American Fork, but somehow we had to go all the way up to Boise, idaho, to do our, to do our, Your transfer. Yes, you see the word. They'll be coming back to me at the transfer, so, yeah, so, anyways, we went all the way up to Boise and I just I just prayed the whole time with that. I was just like, think about this too. Here I'd gone all these natural. You know, i don't want any chemicals in my body or all this stuff. And then I'm like my answer then got to be it's time to do in vitro, and I'm like, oh, you want me to put all these chemicals in my body? You know, i'm like, please just make it work the first time, you know. So, anyway. So I knew he was going to be a boy, and sure enough, we.
Speaker 1:The kind of hard thing, though, was, too, is we ended up putting all four in, because we only had one that looked really, really good quality. The second one was like, okay, it was the whatever, a little bit lesser and not quite as strong looking. And then the other two weren't really like I mean, yeah, not the best chance at all, but they had told us, you know, they go through the thing, and at that time I don't know how they do it now, but at that time they give tell you straight up the more you put in, it does increase your chances, and you do have these and you know. But you got to know that you know got to sign all the waivers And so I really didn't think there was a chance that all four would take, of course, and so I thought, okay, chances are we might have twins. I could do twins, you know, and this could be cool, and even just one, we're just hoping for one one.
Speaker 1:But that week after the transfer, was it? It was that week or two, while we were waiting, like a few weeks Anyways, that Nadia, the octuplet mom, her story came out that she had only had four in. So there was a split second And then I left. I'm like, no, that won't really happen to me, but I'm so stressed out, i know, so crazy, i'm like, oh my gosh, just kidding, i'm gonna have eight. No, but no, we the second one had attached but didn't make it, and so we just got our Michael. So that was. I mean, his labor was a long one and his dad passed out in the hall, not during the delivery but in the hall, because he's one of us that eaten, so I think his expense was more than our expense on the delivery portion of Michael, but he was, i think, our most expensive baby.
Speaker 1:But yes, so we got our Michael And of course it's all worth it when you just no matter what you go through, when you're just holding them and you're like, oh my gosh, like okay that it happens. So it makes it all worth it. My heart does go out to people that if you've been through and you've done all these things and it hasn't happened yet, i'm so sorry But I just, you know, I just can't imagine, you know, going through it time and time again. It just is so hard. But for us, luckily, it worked. It worked the first time, so we got our Michael And yeah, then after that I was like, okay, I found out another little piece from that lady that taught me about the getting away from all the Zenoestrians, the chemicals and stuff. She had also taught about something called ashwagandha to support the adrenals, and so I can't remember why I hadn't really heard it or grasped onto that concept before.
Speaker 1:But with Michael, before my next one, i was starting to feel like, okay, i need to probably not wait very long because I'd probably be the most fertile now. Even though I wanted to nurse him longer, i was having my period, i think, and so I was like, okay, we better just start trying. And so he was only like six months And even though the dreams of breastfeeding him you know, because with the adoption, even though I tried, i did do the supplemental stuff and I did a little bit, but it just was that. You know. My second one, i thought even having the six months longer and prepping longer, with like month or two or three before I don't know, it just still didn't work And as well as I'd wanted it to, and I couldn't. Even with the second one, the first one I could, i did get some in, but anyways. So my third one I thought, oh, i could just breastfeed him and all that, you know, enjoy this. And then I realized, oh, i've got to hurry and try if we're going to get this one here.
Speaker 1:And so once I introduced at that time I did learn about foot zoning. Back when my boy was just a few months old, i learned about foot zoning And so I was doing foot zoning on myself, going to people sometimes, but between the foot zoning. And then once I added in Ashwagandha to support my adrenals, that following month she just I got pregnant. And so, yes, so fast, Yes, so I just was like wow, wow. And so for just the stars that aligned there, i was just like wow, and I have been able to help people with those pieces of staying away from you know what, to stay away from all that list and then to have some foot zoning and then to support the adrenals with Ashwagandha.
Speaker 1:I've at least two that I know of. that you know has ended up being their route too, but it's, i know everybody's path is different, but it can be helpful and it doesn't hurt. You know everybody needs support The Ashwagandha. If you don't know what that is, it supports it's a eryvetic herbal remedy for thousands of years they've used And it's very supportive to the adrenals with helping reduce cortisol and then in turn, when you can, it functions, so it can basically help helps your body end up producing more progesterone on its own is basically the bottom, bottom line with that, and that was my issue with again, with the estrogen dominance, you need to lower the estrogen, but then you need the progesterone to come up And so that's, that's two.
Speaker 1:Just I feel like I need to say this real quick Be out there who struggles miscarrying in those first 12 to 16 weeks, look at progesterone, either supporting your adrenals with the Ashwagandha or working with the compounding pharmacist to get some progesterone cream, or even if you decide to do a progesterone shot. Sometimes this doctor still are not recognizing this, but that one is an easy fix If you, if it's happening a lot, that 12 to 16 weeks it's usually your progesterone. So please try, try that simple thing and see if it can help you. Yeah, it's just a thought, yeah, so, yeah, so we, we got pregnant with our, our Savannah, and so she's. So my, my boy is 13 and Savannah turns 12 on the 13. So they're about 16 months apart. That's how far apart my boys are. They're well, they're 15 months apart.
Speaker 1:So I know what it's like to like really want to keep breastfeeding and doing all the things. And then you have another one and it's just like, ah, it's a lot, yeah, but I was just so, yeah, we're just like, ah, we're just so grateful, it was so awesome, yeah, but then Savannah, so she's turning 12. So I think just the little end piece of my thing is you know, we could just be grateful and happy and be done, but after Savannah, i've always felt like there's at least one more, or possibly twins, and it hasn't. It hasn't happened. And so, you know, sometimes you think, oh well, i figured it out Now I got pregnant once, but again it just happened again. So I'm going to start working on the conscious things about the ashwagandha and other things, tips and stuff.
Speaker 1:I have an appointment, you know, to go. I did have a little. I was going to start with Invitro and just be like, okay, we're not getting any younger And I'm I'm thinking I'm going into menopause, and so I went in. I ended up having a laparoscopy just in November And so this is just this is being recorded in February or the first of March, So just a few months ago.
Speaker 1:So just a few months ago I had or like three months ago or so, i had a um in vitro laparoscopy, just because I haven't had any pains, and this is one thing I think I need to bring up. This is why I'm going here is because sometimes people can have horrible pains and cramps and emotionally feel horrible with endometrosis, and other times you don't have the pain. So all these years I have not had the pain that I did used to have And when the cyst would rupture and stuff. I was doing healthy things and and I thought, well, maybe there's a slight chance I know it doesn't happen but maybe the endometrosis just isn't growing anymore. Well, i went in and I did, i had to do the laparoscopy, cleared everything out And I found out that, um, yeah, numbers aren't real great on the, the um, the egg reserve number, and so, um, i am going to be working with, uh, uh, chance with the um, the fertility you know clinic, about that, and um, possibly in vitro um coming up real soon.
Speaker 1:So so, yeah, it's just an IM44. And so I just think a thing out there is I, um, i think part of you just asking me on this call or on this um you know podcast is really for me to. It just is a helpful reminder. Um, as, as I think about you know, i have had these promptings and each of them they came into fruition and even though I'm 44 and the doubts will come, you know well, maybe I'm too old or maybe this or maybe that it's just like you know what we're gonna get this one.
Speaker 1:And then I think this time, you know, instead of before in my story, i was like oh, so excited that I could share with other people struggling with the endometrosis and what I did to support the adrenals and how we got that, you know. And or through adoption I could help, you know, just be a light and comfort to others. And now it's like, okay, i just had the thought this morning it was kind of a dumb moment, but it was just like, oh my gosh, like this time it's your experience being older, like being 44 now, and like you'll be able to like help people with, like okay, well, this is what I did and this is how we got you know. And so I think yeah, i think I. It's just a reminder to me to stop the doubts and just remember that you know God has got a promises, what's happened before and all the ways, and you know so it will happen too. But that's where I am at.
Speaker 1:So, after all these years, i'm having a 12 year old. She'll be 12 in just a week and a half. There'll be a big gap, and so this will be a whole nother experience. But yeah, that's my kind of long story. I just love that. You've experienced, like, all of the different ways to build your family. I mean through adoption, ivf, having Savannah, naturally, and now you're 44 and you're ready to do it all over again. I think that is the coolest thing ever. I love it. Well, the funny thing is, i thought, yeah, i've done it all the ways.
Speaker 1:And then I'm like, oh, okay, actually, oh, what I was going to say about? so, after that surgery, so so I go in and I have the surgery, and then I have one little cycle and I got sick, and so my kids got sick, all that happened, so I couldn't get it back in for the follow up and then I don't have a period, you guys. And so for a minute I'm like could I be pregnant? You know, could I be pregnant after it just had that laparoscopy and could I be? And I'm like, i don't know, I don't feel like usually when I'm pregnant, like all of a sudden I'm like peeing all the time, not just at night, but even right off. It's so weird, even just like soon. But I'm not, i'm not doing that. And I'm like, okay, i'm not going to get excited, but it was hard. Because I'm like, okay, i could be pregnant, i could be pregnant.
Speaker 1:And then I realized, you know what, nope, my body's in menopause. So I did not have a period and I did not have a period and I did not have a period. Well, i started to take some phytoestrogen and then I just got my period, like a week ago, so anyways. So I'm like that's exciting. Some of us like don't want that, but it's like yay, so anyways, so yep. So that's why I'm like, okay, you can tell your story, so like you took this and that was, and because the doctor, i didn't really want to go in yet, but I was going to go into the doctor and they were going to give me a medication to start it, and I was like, okay, i'm the father, that's what you want, but I really would rather do it naturally, and so I decided to try this first, and so I think it's like another thing I think for me to trust I might.
Speaker 1:I'm feeling like the impression is I might actually be able to do this with the natural resources and nutrients and things in the midwife I know, and so I might be able. My story might end up being this was our way to have this one, instead of having to do it the in vitro route, and so we'll see if it is the in vitro route. I'm okay with that too, like either way, but that's like that's just this morning. It's like you know, you know those thoughts are starting to come up and I'm like, okay, i'm all for it. So you have to start listening, yeah. So I just got to be really, really intentional and listen and focus and yeah, and I have a lot going on with my business and my family, so it's like you know what this needs to come first And so I've got to just, you know, take that time to meditate.
Speaker 1:But that's one thing that's always helped me too is, even like before my boy, like 14 years ago, my very first meditation. You know, it really helped me to just get clear and get insights and stuff. So if you haven't done any meditation or some of that mindfulness, i would encourage you to get connected with your self-moral too and find more peace, even whatever you're going throughout there. Everybody can benefit from meditation, and I do some guided meditation, some things like that, if you want any resources.
Speaker 1:Anyways, meditate, however, whatever, and just come back to that calm, because I think it's so easy with whatever whether it's infertility or other stresses it's so easy with the world, with everything going on outside of us, to get off, to get distracted, to give in to that stress and that, of course, all the adrenal stuff, and so I just feel like one of the best things we can do is just to keep coming back and reminding ourselves at our core, at our center. If you've had those thoughts or those impressions that isn't wishful thinking chances are you will have. However they come to you, you will get that, hopefully. I pray that you will. But just listen. Either way, you'll be able to meditate and connect with yourself and that outside chaos will calm down and you'll just be able to have peace, no matter what you're dealing with. I feel like when you meditate and just turn inward, you can have that peace. You can come inward and not be bombarded by all the chaos that surrounds us in this world. So meditate plug for that. I love it. Awesome.
Speaker 1:Is there anything else that you would like anybody listening to know? Is there anything else you feel like you impressed to share? There are some definite nutrients and essential oils that can be beneficial, but we could even that might even be another whole thing of its own. Oh, i'm totally I'm sorry. So just one thing for right now. I'll just mention that recently I heard again or got reminded about I remembered grapefruit was really important, but the grapefruit essential oil I was just told by this midwife the other day, like 16 drops a day if you're in your water, if that's the sweet spot for that. It helps with glutathione levels and just a lot of things in the body, but that one. There's some oils like thyme and ylang-ylang that are good for supporting if it's like again on the progesterone side, to support the adrenals and help your body do its own on the progesterone. So, like thyme or ylang-ylang. Basil is another good one, but that grapefruit, yeah. There's a whole other thing the nutrients and all that stuff. It's lots of good stuff, little pieces, but we can do another one maybe I would love to have it back on. This has been awesome.
Speaker 1:Kristi, thank you so much for being with me today and talking about your crazy journey. Oh, thank you for having me And I know it's a long one, so maybe people can listen to it in bits here and there, but I just have so much gratitude. It's been a crazy ride and it's still not over and I just have gratitude. So thank you, for I always like to help. So if anybody wants to reach out and connect with me too, i'll be happy to help. If anybody wants a resource for foot zoning or other nutrients, all those things we can. Yeah, yep, i'm happy to help because I totally get it Awesome.
Speaker 1:Kristi, where can listeners connect with you if they want to reach out, talk to you about nutrition, foot zoning, alternative therapies? where can people connect? Social media, the one I'm on the most. I'm trying to do better with Instagram, but right now Facebook It's Kristi Larson with the EN and then Corliss Kristi Larson, corliss on Facebook. I am on Instagram. I believe it's essential answers for everyday life, but with a four in it. So I'm working on Instagram. Do them better there. Sorry, it's okay, but I do love it. I'm getting better, but I see it better and more if it's just like a message on the Facebook or if people aren't doing Facebook, email KristiCorliss at gmailcom. That works too. Yeah, yep, awesome. Thank you so much, kristi. Thank you Mariah. I appreciate you. Okay, guys, we will see you guys in the next episode. Thanks, bye.